Sunday 3 December 2017

Sun 3 Dec: AFC Wimbledon (A) L 3-8

To Wimbledon in the drizzle, and a low-key, lighthearted warm-up for the latest lashed-together line-up. Sarah Dillamore was unavailable due to other commitments, while a vomiting bug ended Emily Coulson’s ever-present run of 33 consecutive games over 18 months. Elsewhere on Ward 10, Emily Bashford declared herself available despite the sort of heavy cold that restricted Giulia Clini to a bench role last week.

Annabel Taiwo stepped up to replace Dillers in a back three with Millie Theobald and Amy Hallett, protecting Ruby Rudkin and flanked by wingbacks Jen Neves and Frances Clark. Giulia replaced Emily in the midfield triangle, although she slotted in alongside Carla Novakovic while Liz Kriebel was given the greater licence to roam forward and join Ellas Dodd and Bothamley. Bash was left to snuffle on the bench, knowing she could be brought on as a defender, wingback or forward.



It took all of 80 seconds for the home side to attain a lead they would never relinquish, switching from left to right, cutting inside a half-asleep defence to finish low past Ruby. On the 10-minute mark they were dancing in co-ordinated celebration of their second, lashed home from the D to the top corner by unmarked No.9 Megan. Four minutes later it was 3-0, this one created by a cute back-heel in the D to another unmarked forward who found the top corner, this time via Ruby’s hands.

By the fourth goal, in the 23rd minute, Wimbledon had worked out a pattern of play that was reaping repeated dividends: attack down their right behind the hard-working Fran, then simply stick it in the middle and profit from Teddington’s defensive uncertainty.



Change it had to come, and it did on 27 minutes when Bash replaced Annabel, with Jen switching to the right of the back three and the sub asked to range up and down the right. When she did so with her usual fearless self-belief and joie de vivre, it only served to heighten the contrast with Teddington’s performance in general. It’s to be expected that Wimbledon will be fitter and faster, more disciplined and drilled. What hurt was how much more they wanted it.

Teddington had had the odd half-chance. As early as the second minute, Liz had lofted in a free-kick from the thick end of 30 yards which the goalkeeper required two attempts to gather; not long after, the American tried a quick left-footer from even further out which again worried the net-minder.

And it was from distance that the visitors got their goal on 33 minutes. A much-changed Wimbledon defence couldn’t clear their lines properly, and when the ball fell to Giulia 25 yards out in the inside-right channel, she had no hesitation in sweeping it back past the goalkeeper for her first goal in eight games.


Wimbledon might have gone in 5-1 up but for a goal disallowed for offside, harshly and amid much amicable discussion between the benches. And at the half-time Teddington inquisition there were no raised voices; this was so far beyond a teacup-chucking rollicking that the mood was more resigned, almost literally. In open and honest conversation with the girls, the management duo asked: Have we taken this group as far as they can go? If they’re not listening enough to perform the basics – take a touch, look up, communicate, keep looking around, hassle the opponent – is everyone wasting their Sundays?

Such concerns weighed heavy, but first there was a fixture to fulfil. Desperate to stanch the flow of attacks, Teddington switched to a flat 4-4-2: Fran and Jen dropping as orthodox full-backs either side of Millie and Amy, with Bash and Carla outside of Giulia and Liz. Again, though, Wimbledon scored in the second minute: stronger in midfield, they cut straight through the middle, the big No.16 Debs finishing underneath Ruby from the edge of the box.



That was harsh on Teddington, who had started with good intentions: the forwards linking well and every girl pressing. That continued for most of the half but on Wimbledon were still able to slice through repeatedly and 10 minutes later they bagged their sixth, again slicing through the centre. As the ball arrived at the edge of the area, Ruby came out but the forward got there first and slipped it under her; taking the ring road round Ruby, she collected on the far side and tidied into the net.

Five minutes later, six became seven. Fran did well to dig back and try to hold up the winger, limiting her to a weak cross; sadly it met with an even weaker defensive effort and Debs tapped in. At 7-1 this was now Teddington’s biggest ever losing margin and most goals they’d ever conceded, with more than a quarter of the game to go.

Still, Teddington were trying more, their attitude much more improved than the scoreline suggested. Just before the hour they even managed to put together a good move. Doddsy controlled Carla’s left-wing throw-in on her chest and laid off to Liz, who spread to Bash on the opposite flank. The flier pulled back to Giulia on the edge of the box, whose shot pulled a good save from the goalkeeper. Sadly, Bash had to be withdrawn soon after the hour. Despite being so ill that she almost vomited, she was exemplary in her energy and, more importantly, attitude.



On 66 minutes, Boz scored for the second time in the last four games against her old team. Again, it was a high shot from distance, demonstrating both the goalkeeper’s weakness and the ability of several players within this Teddington team – Liz, Giulia, Boz – to score from range. Boz moves on to six goals from eight games this season despite never really catching fire like she did last year; she is capable of far more if she applies herself with determination.

Two minutes later, Teddington conceded the morning’s most avoidable goal. With Wimbledon lining up a corner and striker Debs towering above the other defenders, the coaches bellowed for Annabel to mark her. Sadly, she didn’t know who Debs was, couldn’t see her number and got absolutely no help whatsoever from any of her team-mates. Sure enough, the corner came in and Debs flicked home at the near post. Reclining again on a six-goal cushion, an entertaining Wimbledon side were playing with a free-wheeling confidence which may be to do with the fact they aren’t serious contenders for the title, already being 20 points off the pace set by the former sparring rivals Palace.



In the final minute, Teddington regained a modicum of dignity by scoring a third. It was worked well across from the right wing, Doddsy finding Giulia whose clever through-ball allowed Carla to score first goal in over a year. Wimbledon were perhaps complicit in the concession: with glee in their boots, they were showboating a little – by now their much-reformulated back three contained at least two forwards as various defenders were encouraged up front to join in the jamboree. It was that sort of game, that magnitude of humiliation.

A rueful Ruby pithily and accurately described the second half as “less sh*t”. But with six losses out of eight games played, and this being easily the worst, if there had been a travelling army of fans on the away end they would have been calling for the heads of the managerial duo; as Dave said, they could have it voluntarily.

Teddington have some able players, some hard-working players, and some who are both. As a team they are capable of matching and beating the middle order of teams like Abbey, Fleet, Hampton and possibly Maidenhead, but they are demonstrably, demolishingly, damagingly miles behind the three Academy clubs at the top of the Premier League.

That’s no real surprise, because in some respects they always have been: 22pts off the title pace in 2017, 29pts in 2016, 13pts in 2015. But whereas these games used to be a yardstick and an opportunity, now they are starting to feel like hidings to nothing, mismatches against teams stuffed with girls who want to turn professional, while Teddington resemble more of a social club. There’s nothing particularly wrong with that – football shouldn’t just be about results. But when competing in a premier league, as Teddington do, they have to realise that they can’t turn up half-hearted. It’s not the losing, it’s the taking part – or being taken apart.

Some soul-searching will have to follow. Such humiliations are no good for a footballer’s development: while there’s something to be said for being toughened up, less good will come from being beaten up. Teddington’s players will need to decide how much they want to play football; the coaches will have to decide how long they can continue to dedicate their Friday nights and Sunday mornings away from their families; and the players may have to decide whether they want to play for these coaches any more.

Next Sunday’s game was always set to be an interesting clash. Seven points clear of Teddington but from two games more, Hampton & Richmond are in that middle order of teams against whom the girls must measure themselves. In the season opener, Hampton’s last-kick winner was a punch in the guts. It will be fascinating to find out how keen Teddington are to avoid such a sickening feeling ever again.

TEDDINGTON ATHLETIC Ruby Rudkin, Annabel Taiwo, Millie Theobald, Amy Hallett, Jen Neves, Carla Novakokic (1g), Giulia Clini (1g), Frances Clark, Ella Bothamley (1g), Ella Dodd. Substitute Emily Bashford.